"It's clean."

So, in my first week of Junior year I have experienced: Hell, Heaven, Purgatory, Valhalla, and whatever other holy, unholy, or canonized place you can think of. But, alas, no photography, and that means less blogging. Ha, ha, yes, folks, I am back and I am rumbling to get rambling about life, photos, books, art, music, and movies with some of my favorite "invisibles".

This past week in school has taught me something, not just educated me in a scholastic manner, but has also given me some life lessons. If you know me at all, I am a paranoid, worried, over-achieving student who cares more about getting good grades than having the admiration of other students. And I have tons of actually good friends to help me through it anyhow. But this year, something was up. The beginning of the year in high school, is as chaotic and mentally-toxic as ever, but something else hit me. For once in my life, at school, I was happy.  Now, you may not know me, but as Woody Allen says "If I don't get at least 13 hours (of sleep), I'm a basket-case." and I've always hated school, but I've done extremely well, which is always a very hard thing in my mind to cope with. I had planned to be as happy as possible this year, and to enjoy every second of my education, even through the tough stuff like research papers and falling grades when I am really putting forth a true effort. But I am not sure what is happening to me. The new teenage phenomenon is to be struck by happiness, I suppose. Many kids don't realize that life is worth living and ingenuity and uniqueness create the balance of it. And as I sit, listening to Imada, On a Chill Pill http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjd42J0RpjE , one of my favorite "city" songs other than some Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald, Chick Webb, Harry Connick Jr., and many other beautiful jazz musicians you can think of, I wonder what book I will read tonight, I wonder about my future, I think I should practice my guitar and banjo. I wonder... who will I be in this throng of the universe? In this mysterious blip of a life that may not matter? Here is a shot by Margaret Bourke-White, also one of my role models in life:

I want to be something. I want to be someone... just like everyone else hopes for themselves. But how must I achieve this? I was reading Three  by Annie Dillard last night, and in particular of those "Three" I was reading Pilgrim at Tinker Creek, one of the most insightful, philosophical, and beautiful books I have ever read. If any of you have children you want to grow up to be wise and raised in the right way, have them read these books. I kid you not. Read these books yourselves. I highly recommend them for those lost and weary souls who have to go down without "one more cup of coffee a'fore they go to the valley below" to quote Bob Dylan in one of my newly favorite songs. You may feel that you never have had that one cup of "coffee" before you go. I definitely have that feeling when I wake up to go to school at six a.m. every morning, for sure. Not joking. I don't drink coffee before school, however. Makes me crash. Only the philosophical and metaphorical espresso, and mostly in the evenings do I drink Lavazza and Greek Coffee. Anyways, back to Annie. She questions, as she wanders through the wilderness for kicks (this book is a true story, by the way) , why people just can't be satisfied with the simple things in life. She characterizes it as when she hid a penny for someone to find when she was a young thing, just for the thrill of making someone's day. A penny can't make someone's day, is the belief of today's greedy, Wall Street society. But I decided it could make mine. If you can't have something that you want that may be out of your reach, learn to settle for something less, but less in someways, can more beautiful and righteous. Try talking to everyone for a day.  Try smiling at someone. Listen to everything as Hemingway said. You can learn a lot just by thinking in a righteous way. You can learn a lot about the value of a photo for instance. "An example?" You ask. Well, shoo! I thought you would never ask. Here you go, one of my most favorite controversial shots by Margaret Bourke-White (again. You noticing a pattern yet? :) )  : 

This photo portrays how society treated others a long time ago. It's time to change. And we still are changing. I hope I haven't offended anyone. But we must unite. And I am not just saying this to sound patriotic, but people really need to realize that they are blips in time and millennium, and they will not matter one day. What are they going to do to be remembered? Margaret Bourke-White has captured the essence, prejudice and pitiful beliefs of a basically good society. I think that that is very deep on her part, seeing that she lived in that society. And we still live in that. Capture the moments. Capture what may be important to you. You can never please everyone, so try your best to please yourself and those around you. Respect your art.

So, here's a funny thing. You know how on my previous post I put a clip from David Lean's Lawrence of Arabia? I just discovered that they are showing it, newly restored in theaters, October 4th. I am going. I have to go to see one of my favorite flicks on the screen for the art of it. I have watched this four hour adventure many a'time. And I want to see it in the theater. I thought I would just let those who shared that enthusiasm know. LONG LIVE 'AWRENCE! 

Reporter: "Why do you like the desert?"

Lawrence: "It's clean." 

Signing off, 

this has been Camille Elaine Craig, reporting to you life and liberty for the well-being of your art. 

"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."

-Henry David Thoreau

My belief is he was the gardener of literature. :) ;)

Super 8

"Getting lost in your loving is your first mistake" to quote Gordon Lightfoot in is ever-famous song Sundown.  I am not quite sure how I view this saying, because I love getting lost in loving. It's like getting lost in art. We lose and find ourselves when we create. My Dad just returned from California, and while he was gone, not that it was a good thing that he was gone (I MISSED HIM!!!), I began to find myself within my own art and independence. As I was finding myself in this world, I stumbled upon a beautiful 8 mm Tower: Triple-lens video camera from the sixties or seventies. I call my photo Super 8 because it's the same camera they used in that movie to film the horrific train wreck that they accidentally encounter while filming a movie. As a movie nut, I appreciate video cameras as well. Here it is. All rights reserved:

Oh yes. $5.45 at Salvation Army. People don't realize what they're shoving into the back of the glass counter case. These aren't worth that much, but still, it runs like a top. It just needs a film roll and maybe a tripod and I would be so set to go. :)

Have any of you ever seen What's Eating Gilbert Grape? Well, if you haven't you're in for a treat, all of you lonesome artists out there will really grow to appreciate this film. I decided to pop it in last night and just swim in its simplicity as I was in a very good mood, and I am now. Gilbert Grape (Johnny Depp) is stuck in his world with a mentally ill brother, Arnie (Leonardo DiCaprio), who demands his attention. He works a job, takes care of his brother and corrupted family, and lives in a small desolate town known as Endora. So he's pretty much caged in. But he meets his new life when someone comes to town. That is all I will tell you. But what does that have to do with photography? Well, as photographers we often feel that things must be presented to us in a certain way, and that's often what stops us from taking a picture. You must grab the bull by the horns. We can't be limited by the setting. Just grab your camera and hold it while you watch a movie or something and then you will look over somewhere and see the simplest photo-op. And you'll be like: That was there all this time? 

Do any of you have a dream destination for your photos? I certainly do. Arabia, Paris, Morocco, New York, Canada, Norway, Egypt, Kilimanjaro, Ngong Hills, Canyon De Chelly, and many other endless places. I could go on for eons about certain places I want to photograph.

Try it. Go outside. Walk around your neighborhood in your favorite pair of shoes. (And sunglasses ;) ).

I am often too dreamy for this world. I fantasize too much. But what is life without metaphysical principles that we all know we obtain and abstain from others because we are too chicken to present our ideas? I have grown against that. I have decided to be kind over clever, to seek what is beautiful and true, and to be educated in the highest way, and in every way, to the best of my ability. I have these friends who think that people who are unable to take risks once and a while are quote-on-quote "weenie" and I disagree. And it kind of pisses me off to think that my own friends think those things. People just aren't ready. Give them time. Life is short, but it is full. Nothing should be done in haste when it doesn't have to be. Some things are essential to be done in haste if you want them badly enough. Catch my drift? This a clip from one of my all time favorite films Lawrence of Arabia, and it tells the true story of one of my biggest role models, T.E. Lawrence. Lawrence is an example of someone who takes advantage and finds joy in every situation of life, even pain. He has learned many a language, traveled far, and done courageous things that most of us wouldn't dare do. I WOULD LOVE TO DO WHAT HE DID! I want to marry someone like him. Haha. He has just taken advantage of life in full bloom, no matter the situation. He sees everyone as equal, and he must help those who have fallen. He speaks Arabic too. I will be going into Middle Eastern studies in college, hoping to learn Arabic so he has a had a very large influence on my life, just like Isak Dinesen. He is one of the few people that has lived in this world that really keeps me going. Here is a clip. Enjoy his simple magic trick: 

This is Camille Elaine Craig, signing off and flying out.

"All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible." -T.E. Lawrence

I'm in love with these sorts of people. They are the reason we live and love it.

P.S. Peter O'Toole is the bomb. :D

Kind Hearts and Coronets

Today started out beautifully. One of the most fantastic days I have had in years, in fact. I woke up, put my clothes on, made a cup of tea, harvested some of the family garden which produced beautiful ruby-red tomatoes, yellow squash, and loads of green beans (while wearing my new favorite sunglasses). Then I decided it would be a good time to (re)start a book. I played a my Hobart Crabtree CD and sat on the front porch reading Annie Dillard and Eric Greitens, still wearing my new sunglasses and sipping on a water bottle. Later in the day, I was chatting with some close friends on facebook (and you're thinking, why the hell do I care?) and one of my most cherished friends made me feel the best I have felt in many years as well. He told me why I was cool. Why I was important, essentially. I told him why I thought he was cool and important. And it felt good. Life is now step higher than it used to be. I feel like life should always feel this way. And I will make it always feel this way.

In photography, we lose ourselves. We worry: "that's not good enough". "That doesn't look like anyone else's art". So? It's your own. It is unique. It is alive in that way. It will make tears well up in your eyes and fire ignite in your soul. You do it because you want to. You tell people your story because you want to. And I am sorry I am not being informative about how to take this picture or that picture, but too many photographers worry about too many rules in my opinion. They say "your lighting is off", or "you're not using the rule of thirds!". And why should we? Give us a few really good reasons why. People who don't worry about unimportant rules find more in life. They do something. They build up the rest of us. They find beauty in everything that is imperfect, as is most of the world. They are the ones that run away from home to write in a journal and live in a car only until one day when they write on a typewriter and live in a mansion because they followed through with their passions and desires. I am not saying to run away, I am just saying be open-minded and try something new and maybe take a chance if you're ready.

I wish I could find love, and I don't look for it. It never seems to come, other than through friends. And that's okay. But life should have the other kind of love too... at some point in time. My heart is always in my throat when I meet someone I love. But it never happens. Why? I suppose the world is forcing me to follow through with my worldly passions such as photography, service work, languages, and travel. Love will come sooner or later. This blog entry is going to be longer than usual. :)   This song is how my life feels, even if you don't like it, just listen to the words. Joni Mitchell is my all-time favorite musician. I believe that music inspires photography as well, so listen to words if you don't mind: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaEyWhwXC7c 
Here is an older shot by me: Love Birds: All rights reserved.

Just ask people if you can take their picture. This girl was kind enough to let me get this incredible shot of her jovial face. The best photos are often by accident. Don't look too hard. Or think to hard. Just do it. Talk to people and don't worry what they think. I have spent too much time worrying and regretting things. It's time to change.

Signing off, 

Camille Elaine Craig

"Today, I wished without mercy in the bloodless nations of the mind,

That a city had gone down with you.

Not as in a war fought..."

-Tess Gallagher, Amplitude, All Day the Light is Clear

One of my favorite poets and one of my favorite poems.

I love you all! Thank you for reading. Arrivederci! 

P.S. To support my friend, here is the name of his awesome band: Great Horned Owl. Look it up! Buy a t-shirt! Haha. Seriously. :)

Have You Ever Been Mistreated?

So, like the eclectic girl I am, I love blues, I love the railroad, and all that stuff that comes along with photography at some point in time. I also love many other things. But that will have to come later. I always feel I have been misunderstood as a photographer. One of my friends has taken to calling me a "hipster" photographer (just to tease me, I know) but it really can get to me sometimes. John Cohen's There Is No Eye: John Cohen Photographs   http://www.johncohenworks.com/photo/upcoming.html  portrays the simplicity and beauty of people "sangin' and a praisin'" in their own ways. Some sit out on the porch and pick it and grin it, while others come under the hand of religion and sing their little hearts out. John Cohen has done something incredible here. He has combined two arts, photography and music, and made it possible to multitask with pleasure. His book also comes with a CD of recordings that include Bob Dylan, Elizabeth Cotten, and many other lovely artists who may be unknown to this day, but they still sing for themselves. Just as we photograph for ourselves.

This photo is not included in John Cohen's book. But it is taken by him. This image is of Roscoe Holcomb, a musician...obviously.

And now I sit, at 4 a.m., unable to sleep from too much cardemom tea, handkerchief tied around my head in an effort to keep my wild, dark hair back in its rightful place, and wonder: why don't I try starting smaller? Why must I constantly achieve more than I can handle? I have made a pact this year as I go into my Junior year of high school, to be constantly happy. It's a very hard task, but it can be done, and I believe so. Remember that sometimes you are not out there to please others and you can never please everyone who walks along the trail with you, but kindness over cleverness can create intelligence which then leads to happiness all around you. Try something new with your photos. I am not just saying like any other human being "think outside of the box", but think, what really touches your heart when you see a photo? What makes you melt into a warm pile of firewood on an Autumn evening? What sings to your soul when you sip hot cocoa, kiss your lover, fly airplanes? What? What is it that you really want? Do it. Take the leap and take the picture. Take the picture of life and its incredible beauty. I have recently had trouble with loneliness, but I am overcoming that obstacle by surrounding myself with things and people who I love. John Cohen is truly genius in this way. He has taken something that he really appreciates and touched his own as well as many other peoples' hearts just by sharing their power as human beings through his own power as a celebrity and artist. I personally have done this with photography with my own Father's beautiful passion for the banjo which he is currently teaching moi. Here we are. I have many other good shots of him, but this one is the one that has grasped me the most. Taken with a Nikon D40, my current tool of trade, I present to you my handsome Father. All rights reserved:

I would also like to share with you a picture of a busker in the streets. I am afraid I cannot share the location. But this image is taken by me. He was a sweet guy who played Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young on the sidewalk. Gave him a few dollars for his picture and talent. All rights reserved.:

"Color is my day-long obsession, joy and torment. To such an extent indeed that one day, finding myself at the deathbed of a woman who had been and still was very dear to me, I caught myself in the act of focusing on her temples and automatically analyzing the succession of appropriately graded colors which death was imposing on her motionless face."

-Monsieur Claude Monet

One of the greatest artists to ever have walked this earth...

P.S. The title is actually a famous folk song included in Cohen's fantastic book. 

This has been Camille Craig, signing off and wishing you a lovely day.

Fare thee well.

I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM THE READERS! Just to let you all know.  So comment all you want so long as it's fitting and appropriate. 

Adios, muchachos y muchachas. Adios.

Visions Inside My Head

I was lying in my bed last night reading Tess Gallagher poetry and listening to Joni Mitchell (like the Renaissance woman I am) and I sprang upon an idea. Why don't we try more to please ourselves with the visions we have inside ourselves? How come we settle for less? How come everyone grows up thinking "I'm going to be a ballerina" or "I want to be an astronaut", and so many of us actually hang onto those dreams as if they were life support, but they never fall through? I connected this with the idea of photography. To the idea of the perfect image. So many of us want to be famous from that one image that we envision, but many of us never achieve it because we feel that we are held back from it. It's sort of like wanting something or someone who is out of reach. We have all felt it. And life is a little dissatisfying, but what can we do? Die? Would that be more fun? No. Life is incredible. Grab it by the horns. Alfred Eisenstaedt certainly did with his famous image on V-J Day (Victory Day in Japan for all of you non-historians), August, 14, 1945 The Kiss:

Upon the idea of envisioning your perfect photo, I stumbled upon a recent web-surfing scoop that was in the backstage of my mind. Vivian Maier, the famous street photographer, who frequently and overall used the famous Rolleiflex camera has some perfect examples of achieving random, yet beautiful photos. Rolleiflex is notable for many things, and all things that connect with fantastic quality. Vivian Maier, sadly, became known for her photography just before her timeless death on the date of April 21, 2009. But doesn't she reign? Her use of parallax (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/parallax?s=t) is exceptionally pleasing to the eye. And why is it? Because she made photography a priority of hers (even though she nannied children as an occupation), she made time to perfect her art through random ideas, and through accepting what was presented to her with the fervor of that kid at Christmas. Here is a beautiful example of someone's lovely memory asleep on the bed, with somebody (mom?) in the background. The lighting is like chocolate fondue as it folds and cools in your mouth as you let the still-warm liquid slither down your throat. If I can just find it here.... AH! Here we go ladies and germs:

Ah. Yes. Perfection personified. But I'll let you be the judge. If there is no such thing as perfection in this world, then why does the word "perfect" exist? To achieve it. To achieve greatness. 

"Difficult times have helped me to understand better than before, how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way, and that so many things that one goes worrying about are of no importance whatsoever."

-Isak Dinesen. 

Today's quote.

Thanks for reading! Signing off. 

Camille Elaine Craig

Hope you enjoyed it. Because I enjoyed writing into the void of the unknown. 

Willkommen! Bienvenue!

Welcome to the first edition of Inside and Out: A Photographer's Lifestyle (Slowly Growing). The reason I have created this blog is to share the world of photography with those who may or may not have the interest or addiction that most of us feel. Or maybe you just want to learn something new. Come, take my hand. Let me show you the light(ing).

Inside and Out (for short) is a place where photographers of all levels can share opinions, photos, stories (of photos), life stories, their issues and how those issues have contributed to their lives as a photographer, links to photos (if you send viruses, pornographic material, or any other thing that may be deemed inappropriate you WILL be reported and dismissed), their role models in the photographic world, and anything else you think that may suit you and your new colleagues. We can even have counseling sessions if you want! So we are an everything site, in alleged terms of agreement, that is.
Now, you may ask, why does it say "(Slowly Growing)" at the end of the title? Because, my friends, foes, ladies, and gents, I am slowly growing as an editor, photographer and human being. I wish to hone in on what life can be worth. I have remembered the idea that life isn't a story about you, it's a story about who and what happens to come your way. If it was only about you, then you would be floating in a void with no photography, no love, no virtues, no ANYTHING! I want to give you a place of solace as well as recognition in this sometimes lonely world. I will be posting some shots by moi, as Miss Piggy might say, as well as weekly ideas, links, and everything else mentioned in order to add the fuel to the fire. Movie scenes are acceptable as well, in order to portray inspirations, cinematography (a form of photography), and stories being told are also welcome. But, please, nothing inappropriate. If you wish to send in something that you think might be risque, cross it by my palm first, thank you very much.
Let us begin then.

P.S. I cannot guarantee the schedule of the blog. I will most likely update it every Saturday from now on. But, sometimes, I may be busy. So don't get your knickers in a twist! Have conversation and allow the world to unfold, even without any of the editor's ideas. Start your own ideas.

Love,
Your Editor-in-Chief,
Camille Elaine Craig 

Photographer of the Day. Guess who? She is one of my favorite role models. Hint: She was the first woman to ever work for LIFE magazine and was also the first woman to be sent into the war-zone during WWII to take pictures of the atrocities and battlefields. Post your guesses!